Here we go!

Okay, a friend said to me "You should get a blog!" and hasn't mentioned it for quite some time but I'm going to pretend it was his persistent nagging that got me to abandon my hectic schedule and write about pretty much nothing.

Blog name- Pretty self explanatory. I rant as I am sometimes prone to do, only using the powers of the written word combined with the accessibilty that only the internet could offer, my rants are granted immortality. So that's all cleared up. Good.

First thing I want to talk/write/rant about is the Sham-Wow! If you haven't seen this beauty in action, I command you as the Overlord of this particular blog, to YouTube it this instant.

Seen it?

Good! Now you can't tell me that a towel that can hold 10x it's weight in fluid isn't friggin'awesome. You see what he did to that wet jumper? He just rolled it up in the Sham-Wow! and it was completely dry. That isn't great. That isn't even awesome. That's magic. That's what it is. It's f***ing magic! If you wanted to buy one of these things without a credit card, you'd probably have to go to Diagon Alley. To top it all off, the guy selling this magical towel is probably the same guy who sold "magic beans" to Jack. I mean if he tried to sell me anything, I'd HAVE to buy it. He's just so ridiculously convincing. Maybe he only sells magic things? Maybe he's a wizard using his magic to convince us to buy his magical crap! Oh my god... I think I've stumbled onto the secret of the century! Jack was stupid, Vince Offer swapped him magical beans for 3 easy payments of $19.95 (+ postage and handling), people who watch midday infomercials are stupid and he's pulling the same trick!

But that's besides the point. The point is I want one of these magical towels. Or at least change my name to "Shan-Wow!". Just so when girls ask me why I can say "Cause I'll have you saying Wow...every time"

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Anyway, so if you're ever hanging out with me and you see some pretty girls, call me Shan-Wow. Which brings me to my next topic. Pretty girls.

I was watching TV ealier today and I saw a City Beach ad (I think that's what it's called) and the ad is full of hot chicks and not-so-hot guys. Now I might be slightly biased, but if you look around, there's a helluva lot more very attractive girls then there is guys. Like it's insane if you actually open up your eyes and look for it. Now what does this prove? Well, thanks to my year 12 education in Biology that I did in year 11, I know exactly, 100% what this proves.

One of two things.

1. Males were more likely to choose attractive female partners and because of this attractive females were more likely to breed and pass down attractive genes to their daughters.

2. Females weren't as shallow as men and chose more deep, important characteristics in a partner rather than base their decision entirely on appearence and as such, good looks in males wasn't such a massive part of genetic selection.

Or a combination of the two.

Now incase you don't know me too well or haven't picked up on it by now, I'm a feminist. So this observation led me on further thinking about relationships and partners and the like. Without getting too much like one of those bad romance movies that comes out almost every second week, the moral of this little lesson is, guys, realise that girls won't judge you solely on what you look like and as long as you're a good person and they're not a bitch, you should be fine. Just try not to be shallow when you're looking for a partner. Or do be shallow. Cause if you're not then over an extended period of time of men not being shallow, female appearence will drop until your great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandson will be married to a troll.

....

Damn, I lost it.